#same

I wish I could say I was #different. But I'm freaking exactly the same as the majority. I do my work quietly just like everyone else. I smile too much and laugh too little and make mistakes and am too passive, just like everyone else. It's all the #different people I envy. They walk down the hall and turn heads. They color classrooms with their clever wit. They get in trouble. But no, I'm just like everyone else. I keep my nose clean and stay out of trouble, just like I'm expected to. If I was #different I would've gotten chosen to clap the chalk erasers in elementary school. If I was #different, I would get asked to homecoming. But no, I'm too #same to even come to your mind. If I was #different, my friend wouldn't have had to convince someone to ask me to prom last year. Some boy would have wanted to ask me on his own. If I was #different, you'd want to actually know me. ME. Not my pen name but the real me.

but I really am just Korra, it seems. Just too... monotone. Too background. Too #same. I seem insecure because I don't put myself out there. They always say 'be yourself', right? Well what if I am being myself. What if 'myself' is #same. What if I was just born to be the face that you skip in the crowd when you look for your friends at lunch. What if I don't even have the capacity to catch anyone's eye, to make them want to look at me, not just through me. What if I've tried to be #different but I'm so #same that even my wild attempts were ignored. What if no one will ever think I'm any #different than the next girl, than the next blog, than the next hopeless romantic, than the next hopeful BYU student. What if I'm so #same that I'm about as interesting as the quotes on the walls above the lockers.

Perhaps the way I'm #different is how extremely #same I am.